For the love of two grandmas

Uttara spent time with grandparents all through her childhood. We wanted her to learn Tamil and know her roots. We also were both working full time and thought it a better option to have her spend her summer holidays in India than at day camps here. She was not always happy to go, but once there was always sad to leave. Her trips to India helped her bond with folks who were less fortunate and in some ways got her to become a little more humane. She always shared what she was given with my mother in law’s maid’s daughter who was her age and they were each others’ confidant. Their worlds were so far apart that the gap was somewhat insurmountable to amount to a greater friendship as they grew older. However, even now they pick up where they left off.

She was lucky to have both sets of grandparents dote on her all through her childhood. They would vie with each other to nourish her body and nurture her soul. Grandmas would cook her favourite foods and grandpas would read to her edifying books and regale her with stories from mythology. They were all wonderful role models and for that we are very grateful.

Every time she left India she would be showered gifts all of which she has still kept, however small. Old coins, jewellery, crafts and cards. She in turn would write them each a note expressing in child like language her gratitude and emotions of sadness to leave them. She would also include a drawing.

Now, all grown up, she visits surviving grandmas every year for about a week. She talks often to them, on the phone. She always spends her time exclusively with them and they appreciate it. Her Tamil improves and she is thrilled with that. This time, adult like, she took them out for lunch.

On this trip, her paternal grandmother gave her a project which she took seriously and completed. She transformed a faded Krishna sculpture into a lively one, with vibrant colours. On his bidding, she also drew a picture of Krishna with a cow for said grandmother’s brother. But nothing for my my mother who may have expressed her disappointment, saying “you did not have time to do anything for me”. It must have bothered Uttara that she had neglected to please my mother. However the eve of her trip had arrived. The Krishna had taken all evening to complete and by the time she got to Amma’s it was 9 pm. Then the last of her packing. Next day, she had to leave the house at 4:30 am for her 7:30 flight. However, when my mother woke up early to make her coffee before her flight, she saw a hand drawn Ganesha on her side table. Her eyes welling up with tears of joy and gratitude she saw her grand daughter off at the airport, bestowing her a hundred kisses. Utta had stayed up late to leave something for this grandma as well!