Sunday, February 3, 2019

Preparing for the end


I wrote earlier about a mother whose child was diagnosed with terminal cancer last year. She amazed us all with her dogged effort to get him the best treatment and a normal life. So she said no to Wish Foundation Disney World trips but instead gave him normalcy. No also to radical medical Intervention that would rob him of a normal life. He got through treatment last winter and had an amazing year, each day a bonus and a gift which his mother made extra special with school, fun activities and undivided attention, a five year old’s dream. Alas the good times came with a time stamp and now the tumour has returned twice its original size. So after more radiation it will be months or even weeks, a mother’s worst nightmare. But she has organized the home, got her family to plan their time off around when he will be palliative and has shown the same equanimity and strength she did at the time of his original diagnosis. That was earlier this week. At the end of this week, ironically, I was invited to sit with someone in his late eighties, who has meticulously planned his last days including his passage into the other world. He showed me five boxes of files all meticulously tabulated and organised. His primary objective to control how every detail is managed after he is gone - with nothing left to ineptitude or chance. He even has made a list of people to be invited to his cremation with their contact information. It has been an interesting and thought provoking week. What is this life? What is it’s meaning for each of us ? Ultimately is it about our legacy? Or about a life well lived, on our terms? Are we the body, our thoughts and memories? Or are we deathless, animated by and expressions of consciousness that flash and pass like pictures on a screen? Experientially what do you each feel you are? I would love to hear!