Utta’s Journal entry 2 – Summer 2004
Umarani
It's funny how some friendships are not based on time or
space. Such is my friendship with
her. I come every two years, and even
though I come so infrequently to the Mandaveli house, when she is around, it
always feels so natural to just pick up where we left off. Now this time we only spoke at length twice,
but it felt so spontaneous. I find it difficult to understand why people make
so many demands off her - basically to sub for her older sister, who has broken
her leg. Over and above work at other
houses, she comes to work at our house for two hours on top of doing her
BA. It all seems so unfair. What kind of life is that? She makes Rs. 400 a month. Recently thathappa decided to keep attendance
and I confronted him about that. This seemed mean since she does not get paid
enough. After that day he doesn't do it
anymore. Perhaps he listened to me. Here
she comes now sweeping the floor. Oh my,
we collect so much dirt. I like the way she goes about her work, sweeping the
floor, using Sabina to wash dishes and neatly washing clothes and rolling out
the wet clothes in such a way as to make it easy to dry. I almost feel tempted to do the work,
watching her do it. Of course, I know it
will not be so much fun if it was a job.
When she was younger she would accompany her mom and sister, who did all
the work, and we would play hopscotch and this other game where we tried to
pick up as many stones as we could as our palm hit the ground. I remember her teaching me Tamil and I tried
teaching her English. We also played
pallankuzhi upstairs in the dark. I remember her calling Rohan
"Loganth" and him hating it.
When the cat had kittens we would all carry them. Such good times - now looking back. I wouldn't trade them. I hope she doesn't
leave us for a better job as selfish as that sounds, I promised to go to her
home again this year, as I used to in past years. I remember people being so fascinated with
me. They offered me chilled water, which
I didn't drink, but it was a nice gesture. Now, the truth is I was self-
conscious, but I will say yes the next time.
Visitors and guests
Just now, a man came to our door and said he was going to
Tirupati and wanted some money. Jayamma
gave him about two to three rupees but he wanted more. She shouted at him
telling him he was ungrateful, and then he nodded and left. Just now another man came and asked if he
could pick some flowers. I initially
misunderstood thinking he was here for our upstairs tenants and then called
Jayamma. She sent him on his way. It is amazing how many people come by asking
for something. Pretty soon this old man
will come in to ask for food. I want to
give because I've been given so much in this world, but I don't know how much
of this I would be able to take. I complain sometimes that my grandparents are
cheap, not the most philanthropic sort, unless it has to do with us, but the
truth is they are much more giving than any of us, the way they have taken care
of Rajam athai. Even though they scold
her sometimes, they are so patient considering she has been with them for the
last 10 years. She is now 98. Also they deal with these people that come to
our house every day. It is great, really.
Jayamma often talks a lot about her problems. How she has been serving her family members
ever since she was 16 and how she has taken care of sick and some sickly people
all her life. Some don't feel sorry for
her because she's constantly voicing it.
Music and miscellany
And for the last time, I don't want to go to your
neurotherapy class, Jayamma! Today I
have to sing for Dhanalakshmi mami. She's very nice and it is a tradition that
I go and see her on every trip. She has been living alone for years now. I
haven't practiced my music in a year and
I'm not optimistic about the outcome.
Jayamma reasons with me saying, I can
sing. But how does she know?! It's going
to really suck.
I'm in Mandaveli once again and I am bored. Why do I stay here, this long? Guilt? Some guilt and just to spend time with
the grandparents, even though there is nothing (literally) to do. Today I sang for the first time. Jayamma
busted out the tape player of course and
give me pointers, as usual, which I mostly ignored. However, given that I
haven't practiced for a year, I was good.
Damn good. Thathappa even said
so. They want me to come here for a year to learn music. Hell no. Haha, I can imagine the boredom
already. I can also imagine no friends, parents, TV, internet. Man, that would be painful!
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